I know that I shouldn't prompt for an answer when I ask, "What's Important About Money......To You?" However, do you have any suggestions on "alleviating" the client's "anxiety"? Also do you think this is because of their experience (or lack of experience as it pertains to planning) or is it my Way of Being™?

Article ID: 196

Last updated: 20 Nov, 2019

Just relax and give them plenty of emotional space to think of their first answer. If necessary, ask the question again more slowly, “What’s Important About Money To You?” with a greater emphasis on "To You."

Also listen to your recordings of your Financial Road Map Interviews™, paying special attention to the opening. How well do you follow the script? Is your pace relaxed? Do you ask the “What’s Important About Money To You?” question in a thoughtful, inquisitive and curious manner? Was there too much chit-chat and discussion prior to the opening and the “What’s Important About Money To You?” question?

The success of what you are currently doing is base on what immediately preceded it.

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I recently had a Financial Road Map Interview™ meeting with a prospective client. She brought her Financial Road Map® to the meeting that we had partially completed during our Phone Consultation™. When I started to do the Values Conversation™ during the meeting she just referred to her original Financial Road Map® for her Values Staircase™ answers. Would you have asked her to conceal her original Financial Road Map® so we could start fresh with a new Values Conversation™?

When conducting the Values Conversation™ with a couple, what should you do when they consistently interact with each other? For example in working with the husband, the wife would interject something. I reminded her that we would get to her shortly, that this was a discussion with the husband. The husband would then answer and confer with the wife or otherwise engage her. When it was the wife’s turn, the same thing happened, a lot of back and forth conversations. I would repeatedly steer them back but it was like herding cats. What is the suggestion for making it clear that it is a separate conversation for each of them?

When I ask, "Who would like to go first" I have had three occasions where the husband refereed to the wife out of being polite. So I said, "Well I learned a long time ago to start with the person who does not volunteer” and I start with the husband. When we change over to the wife she says, "Well my answers are the same as him and they just repeat his answers and really don't want to progress up the staircase. How do I determine who to start with?

During the Values Conversation™ I often get the response "Give me an example of what you are looking for,"after I ask the question, "What's Important About...To You?" Could you offer some advice?

I've been having some difficulty in the values conversation with clients not going "higher" than basic needs. It almost seems like I need to cue them that it's OK to go beyond money and that I want to hear about the things that are really important to them. They seem to not understand that and there's nothing in the script to let them know that. To be honest, I’ve deviated from the WIA__TY and the associated framing/bridging framework in order to have clients understand what the exercise is really about...I found it frustrating to keep hearing that money is important to pay bills without anything deeper or more important. Please share your thoughts on these several issues.

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