During the Referral Conversation™, I am frequently met with the answer that my clients’ friends do not trust the company name from previous experience and that it has nothing to do with me. Sometimes the clients admit to being selective in regards to whom they would refer. So, I am wondering what would be best to say besides, "Why don't we let them decide for themselves?” or, “Let's follow the process.” I find that they are resistant because of the above factors.

Article ID: 516
Last updated: 20 Nov, 2019
"Refer your friends to Tracy Heichelbech, the human being. I will talk to them, human to human, about how the concepts in Values-Based Financial Planning™ will help them _______________. This is not about First Command. First Command is not Values-Based Financial Planning™. This is about one human introducing a human to another human to do something good for them. Can you do that?"

Don't include anything in the book that indicates you work for First Command. Just be a human helping humans.
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private Referral Conversation™ -> Compelling Referral Conversation™ Help
private Referral Process/ Follow-Up Phone Call -> Referrals Reluctant to Schedule Phone Consultation™


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b I was just hired this week to work with a former professional (European, not NBA) basketball player. He does not have a lot of money, however he referred me to 3 current NBA players and a current college basketball coach of a major NCAA school. All 4 would qualify as Ideal Clients. All of them make between $1-6M / year income. One of the players is a veteran and has earned about $100M over the course of his career. My client is willing to help me meet these people. I spoke with my Accountability Coach about how best to pursue these referrals, and he suggested that I submit this question to you. Any recommendations?
b I have been feeling and expressing more conviction in my Referral Conversations™ with those who have provided referrals in the past, and either less conviction or sometimes skipping the conversation altogether with those who have not. Other than "perfect the conversation, and do the conversation the same way, every time, similar to the analogy of great athletes perfecting their swings and repeating it the same way every time", do you have any other suggestions?
b Below is a correspondence between a client (Rafal) and the advisor. After Rafal had his Financial Road Map® and Action Plan completed he wanted to refer his friend “Slawek” . He wrote a note on the cover of the Values Based Financial Planning™ book, we were just waiting for Rafal to provide his address and let us know it was ok to send the book because he had not spoken to his friend. We received the response that he did not want to go ahead with it- Please read the correspondence below. Coincidentally, this was the second time this week that this has happened. We are hoping for some feedback to let us know how to handle this more effectively. Client: Hi, I did talk to Sławek, but unfortunately he is not interested in getting any information related to financial services. He is already working with a financial planner that he is quite happy with. Regards, Rafal Trusted Advisor: Hi Rafal, It is perfectly ok that Slawek has a current Financial Planner. To clarify my offer was not to become his Financial Planner, rather the offer was to give him the following gifts: 1. Values Based Financial Planning™ Book 2. 8 issues of our Values Based Quality of Life Newsletters™ 3. Complementary 20 minute Phone Consultation 4. Create his Financial Road Map® As we discussed, I believe everyone deserves to have a Financial Road Map® and know that Values Based Financial Planning™ exists. The purpose of the gifts is to provide value to Slawek and share your experience when we created your Financial Road Map® The benefits you mentioned were “…Very important, make better decisions, more focused, more relaxed about the future, start exercising, keeping healthy.” It sounds like Slawek thinks the offer is to be his advisor. We are providing the gifts to share some ideas that could favorably impact his quality of life regardless of who his advisor is. He mentioned he is happy, my job is to make people happier. Sincerely, Trusted Advisor Client: Hi, Yes, I understand what you have to offer. Sławek is simply not open to this and there is not much that I can do. Regards, Rafal
b I feel like I am over analyzing the right questions to ask in a self referral conversation. The result is somewhat paralyzing. If I have some knowledge of the prospect, his occupation or family situation, what question or questions I should start with. It seems like I am trying to find out if they have other things in their life more important than money or if they are confident in their financial future or if they are comfortable that their entire financial house is in perfect order. What do I ask to lead in to a discussion of the above?
b Another Trusted Advisor and I are planning to get a sample of our Ideal Clients (husbands and wives) together for a cocktail party. Say 3x2 each - total of 12 people plus ourselves. The purpose is to really question whether the VBFP full service and our communication are the same - the 3 meeting process, being part of the Ideal Client Community, 144 point checklist, the 5 critical reports, etc - is working for them. Are we getting our message across or is our enthusiasm remaining with us? Sort of a Client Board of Review. What's working for them and what is not! If it is working, why then aren't our Ideal Clients referring more friends and colleagues to have a Financial Road Map® experience? The cocktail party is a genuine attempt to understand, learn and improve where there are gaps. Not just a subtle push for referrals! So, my questions are - do you think such a meeting would be productive? How would you frame the invitation? How would you stage manage the cocktail party? Are there any "scripts" that might be useful? And any other questions I can't think of yet!
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