When I do the Referral Conversation™ with clients, I'm often getting the response that they'd like to check with the people they want to refer first to get their "OK" to give me their contact info. What do you recommend I say when this comes up?

“I’d like to send your friends a $5,000 cashiers check with absolutely no strings attached; do you think you’d have to call to get their permission to do that?”

I didn’t think so. If you don’t need to get their permission to send a $5,000 gift, what makes you think you’ll need permission to send these gifts?

The actual problem is that they don’t view your gifts as gifts. They view it as a solicitation. Which means, you probably view it as a solicitation. It is key to shift their thinking from referring you as a solicitation versus 4 gifts. It’s vital that you and they remember this is gift process, not a solicitation. As long as they think it’s a solicitation they will throw up obstacles like this.